Choices: A Letter To My Children

You won’t read this until you’re much older.

But what I want to say to you will still apply in 10, 15, probably even 50 years from now. I hope that when you do read these words someday, you’ll understand life a little better. Let’s talk about choices.

Choices.

We all face countless choices in our lives, and sometimes figuring out the “right” choice is difficult in certain situations. While some people try to paint the world as black and white, there is so much gray area.

Sure, there are some circumstances where one decision is clearly right or wrong. But often when you’re faced with a life-changing decision, there is no right answer. Other times, what may seem to be the best choice proves to be the “wrong” one — though you won’t know it until much further down the road.

I made a lot of choices over the years that, at the time, seemed like the correct decision. Many times they ended up causing me more pain and heartache than anything.

But if I’m being honest, I wouldn’t change any of it if I could.

Many people might look at a decision that led to a negative outcome as a mistake. I don’t see it that way.

Calling these decisions mistakes implies that I made the wrong choice in life, that I chose the wrong path. And while the path I took may have been littered with obstacles, I ended up exactly where I was meant to be — I ended up with you.

Right now, in this moment, I have everything I could have wished for and so much more.

Did all of my hopes and dreams from childhood come true? No. There are a lot of aspects of my life that aren’t what I imagined or hoped they’d be. But there are many other things in my life that are even better than I dreamed of in my adolescence.

If I had stayed on the path that led me to what I thought I wanted in life when I was a teenager… well, then I wouldn’t have had you. And what a damn shame that would have been.

My life is much fuller now than it might have been.

Yes, I made my own life more difficult than it needed to be at times. I chose to move across the country for college at 18, which put me in such a deep depression I nearly ended my life.

At 20, I moved into my own apartment and had to work three jobs just to make ends meet. I rushed into a marriage with a guy I barely knew at 22, just to end up divorced that same year. And let’s not even touch on the psychological and emotional trauma I suffered from my first pregnancy when I had to terminate for my personal health concerns.

These choices were just a few “wrong” choices I made in life that led to some of my lowest points. But had I not experienced all of those things, I would not be where I am today. And neither would you.

When you’re faced with a difficult decision in life, remember this:

The universe will lead you to exactly where you are meant to be in life, at the precise moment you are meant to arrive.

We all have the power to decide who we want to be. But the rest of the details of our lives aren’t up to us. Call it fate, destiny, grand design — the puzzle of life is ever-changing based on your decisions, but will always lead you to certain places and people who are destined to be a part of you.

Don’t let your fear of making the “wrong” decision stop you from living your life or facing obstacles head on. You are one piece of the larger puzzle. No matter where you end up in the big picture, the rest of the pieces that makes up your life will fall into place.

So now is the time to make a choice:

Will you live with fear, doubting every decision you make? Or will you live fearlessly, knowing that the universe has plans for you, and no matter which path you choose, you’ll end up exactly where you belong?